A man got hit in the head with a can of coke...
but he was alright because it was a soft drink.
I have a back and legs but don't have hair
you sit on me which makes me a .......
What was the math teachers favorite desert
Pi
What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast?
A synonym roll
You can't run through a campground...
You can only ran because it's past tents
Why was the mama firefly unhappy?
Because her kids weren't very bright.
What do fish play on the piano?
Scales
If you're ever attacked by a gang of clowns...
go for the juggler.
what is a cows favorite holiday?
moo-years eve
What is a plumber's favorite shoes?
Clogs
What do you call a cow with a twitch?
Beef jerky
At an ATM, this lady asked me to help her check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
What is a golf club's favorite type of music?
Swing
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato
When I found out my toaster wasn't waterproof...
I was shocked!
Why are frogs always so happy?
Because they just eat whatever bugs them.
What kind of music scares balloons?
Pop music.
Why was the computer cold?
It left its windows open